Cottage Country

cottage-country(Spoilers) What I learned from ‘Cottage Country’ is that relationships can be difficult. Take, for instance, when Todd (Tyler Labine) kills his brother Salinger… this doesn’t mean he doesn’t love him. There’s just a lot of emotion between them… a lot to deal with, probably makes it hard to handle. Killing people is the sincerest form of flattery.

Every relationship we have can bubble beneath the surface and if we decide to act on it, soothing the tension or let it simmer… that makes up a killer. Todd’s excellent kill, an ax to the throat, (by far the best kill-shot to go with in my estimation), is the ultimate simmering of emotion. Emotions can get too hot for us to touch, if this happens people have a way of going ‘supernova’. When this happens nobody can touch them, and it’s not because they’ve become god-like, its because they’re on fire and can’t be put out! It’s the exact opposite of what happens to Bruce Leroy at the end of ‘The Last Dragon’ and if you don’t get the reference you hurt me on the inside.

Todd seeing his brother as a ghost around the cabin is this emotion continuing to simmer, as he refuses to acknowledge it. It warns him about his crazy-ass wife (Malin Akerman), who has her own emotional baggage to contain. Hell, even the mother and father get in on the act! Life and the tangled webs we weave… so complex! The group dynamic is staggeringly hilarious in this film and makes a person question his own relationships.

Well played, comedy… well played.


Just ‘F’ and Get it Over!

You kiss your mother with that.... oh yeah

You kiss your mother with that…. oh yeah

With the return of Bates Motel for season two, there is only one question on everyone’s mind… in which episode will Norman Bates have sex with his mother. No big deal to me, hey if you wanna go and bang your mother that’s on you. I’m only upset because she… or the voices in his head, kept him from having sex with that teacher. The only problem I find is that Norma (Vera Farmiga) might be insane herself… or just too damn needy. Chick is high maintenance and I don’t think such a “Sensitive Soul”, like Norman (Freddie Highmore) can handle her.

I aint even mad though… alright I am! I was really rooting for little Norman to have sex with his teacher… it’s an obsession. This should’a happened and no, it wouldn’t have helped the storyline… but it would’a helped me. Don’t judge me, and sooner or later you’re all gonna have to admit that Miss Watson (Keegan Connor Tracy) was sending innocent Norman obvious ‘do me!’ vibes. Weird still, how I was hoping for such a thing. I just… I believe in you little Norman.

Weird… the more depraved the show gets…. the more depraved my expectations become. Before the end of last season I was kind of expecting some kind of weird three-way to just pop-up, like Norma and an Asian sex slave, or Norman and a few of his teeny crushes. I wouldn’t have anticipated so many sexual possibilities for young Norman if I’d only seen the movie; depravity yes, but so many possibilities for him getting laid.

Do I sound jealous… fuck you……. okay… I’m jelly. Despite the possibilities, the only one that seems absolute is that… Norman and Norma are going to have relations… in the biblical sense. though, I don’t think Jesus wanted this… not sure though, I haven’t finished the Bible.